I’ve decided to start talking to him 3 days before christmas. I was already in process of treatment of my depression, everything had already fallen apart. Even thought I had finished my semester well I was devastated, for me it was like everything had gone in the wrong direction. but above that, there he was, this enigmatic force in front me forcing me to do somenthin about it. As it was stronger then me, so forgeting all of bad that had happen in my previous weeks, I decided to start somenthin new and give a shot to everything that could be better for me and enrich my soul. I decided to call him up on a date, guess what: he said no. But I’m no quitter, au contraire, I’m a fighter and thats only the beginning, I believe I’m fighting about this till today. He went out with me finally 4 months later, then magically we’ve met in a family party two days after our first date. But in our first date we didn’t kiss or anything, we just hanged out. 5 days after our first date, he had a second date, which was the day we finally kiss. I came into him obviously, he was still suffering with the break up he had gone through 9 days before. It was marvelous for me, and terrible for him. If you ask him, he wouldn’t say that. But I’m sure that’s how he felt. The 7th of may was the day the teared my heart apart for the first time (yes he did it more then once already). It wasn’t his intention in the first time, and it wasn’t his intention on the second time. But the truth is that he did. And at this final one, he repeated several times, that the last thing he wanted, was to make me suffer. it's so inexplicable that it simply just happens. Our third date we kissed again, but before that he said that he couldn’t do that any longer.  I cried enormously the days after that, even thougth he felt nothing apparently, just my feelings. 11 days later I decided to sent him a message, I don’t even remember what I wrote, I just know that he answered me via facebook telling me he couldn’t respond through the cellphone, but that I could call him the next day. I said all right, 4 days after that I sent him a another message, saying that I missed him, he said lets schedule movie to see together!  This time I didn’t awnsered and he thought it was weird. he expected me to have said somenthin immeaditly. And a few days followed through in a repetition of times we just could’t be together, so  finally by the end of the month of may we went out again, and he told it was impossible for us to be any more then friends. 5 days later I wrote him a  letter, talking about my feelings and all my thoughts of how much I desired him. Amazingly he wrote back telling me how brave I was to write a letter even thought I said it myself that it was a ridiculous thing to do in a situation like that. he answered me four hours later, It was  just too much for me to bare, I only replied it 2 days after that because I was probably crying or something of the type. finally I had the strength to respond with a simple I adore you too.